Kissing A Fool

"I was naive, your love was like candy
Artifically sweet, I was decieved by the wrapping..."

My hands have been shaking for about two days... That's what I get for living off of Diet Coke.

Point: I hate soda... but when I don't eat, I drink Diet Coke, it's the bestest appetite suppressant evar.

Rae: I do too read your blog. Trust -- Tina isn't the only one. *frowns*

Do you ever feel like just bursting into song randomly? But not like, faking it... like being completely serious and something like out a musical where you just jump on the table and start jazz handing it and belting out "give my regards to Broaaaaadwaaaaay!!!"

No?

Today was too bloody hot to even think or move. Then I began thinking to myself, "why on EARTH did I want to move to Memphis?!" I began to think, "I most definitely want to move to LA..."

But what I hate about LA? Everyone is a singer/actor/someone trying to be somebody. Fortune badly wants me to move to LA, but I really don't want to be constantly surrounded by competition. I have real chances of being someone here in the Midwest, I have goals, dreams, etc... but moving to LA I would be forced to work two jobs just to keep up with rent/bills/etc, so then when would I even have time to do music? Make goals? Have dreams?

If I make something of myself out here then I already have a foot up on the competition. I am in no rush to make the trek out to LA permanetly. Visiting for work is just fine, ATM.

Tomorrow is my half birthday! Congrats, Jodie! You're old and a half! WOO! Wow, how old am I? I guess I didn't realize that I'm 23. Wow, nearly 24.

So what do you think I am? 23 going on 35? 23 going on 21? 23 going on 10? 23 going on 24? Answer this... :-)

No Authority randomly came on iTunes. Ahh, weird. LOL

Pic of the Day:



Perhaps I am very superficial (omg! is that NEW news?!?) but I am running out of pics to of the day with, so I'm taking a pic of me a day. LOL I thought it was a cute idear.

xoxox

Success.

"Now don't be sad...
Cuz two out of three ain't bad..."

I'm rocking my brand new David Cook shirt today. Oooh, it feels so good.

So yesterday Jennifer told me there was this chick at McD that has to be the dumbest Justin fan ever... well, actually, I retract that -- she's just not as informed as other Justin fans.

Here's how it went.

Jennifer noticed that this girl, Amanda, was listening to Justin's CD and wanted to start a conversation.

J: What are you listening to?
A: Justin Timberlake... the new one.
[Insert Jodie here] -- it was "new" 2 years ago. LOL
Jennifer some how brings up that we've hung out a couple times, and shows her the photo of me and Justin.
A: I hate you.
J: We were on his HBO special...
A: For this album?
[insert Jodie here] -- um????
J: What's your favorite song?
A: Losing My Way
[Jodie rolls eyes.]
J: I only like it live.
A: I've never seen it live.
J: Well... we're having a Timberparty... you should come.
[Jodie rolls eyes.]
A: So is he dating anyone?

WHAT?

Alright, so I can see how some people are just fans of his music and don't really keep up with his personal life and all, but what?? Does she NEVER go online? Turn on the radio?? WALK DOWN THE AISLES AT GROCERY STORES??

[Jodie puts hands in head.]

My hands are dry and I need lotion.

So remember when I was talking about success and whatnot? What makes you successful and all that? Remember how I said that it was TBC?

Continued from part one:

Things are actually starting to look up now. Things are actually pointed in the direction of "successful". There will be huge changes to my life within the next 8 months. It's going to be incredible. I'm elated at just the thought of everything.

I don't like giving away everything because then there's no surprises, but I'll give away a few hints.

*New management
*More recording
*Actual promotion
*New... everything.
*New Jodie.

I definitely feel a rebirth coming on. For the first time in a long time, I'm not really happy, I'm not really sad... I'm kind of just here and I've been having a lot of "out of body" experiences. I can't really describe it, but I can just feel myself changing.

Changing inside and out. Changing who I am, what I eat, what I don't eat, what I wear, where I go, who I chose to spend my time with, what I chose to spend my money on, what I chose to sing.

I think you will genuinely be shocked over the next several months about this transformation. I hope you take notice to these changes and accept them. I am going to try and be myself as much as I humanly can.

Please wish me well on this adventure into myself.

xoxox

Pic of the Day:



God Bless America, for making me a man like this.

You can't see it, but in the "C" theres a little "AC" I loves it. :-)

The girl he went to prom with now works with Jennifer's Mom and she hung up their prom photo in the teachers lounge. :-) Adorable.

Like I've said before... Jenn's dad taught him. Pretty cool... even tho Jenn's dad sucks.

I'm Coming All The Way Live From The 816

"I met her a backyard block party by the bar
And she kept looking at me like she knew who I was
She was buzzin' all over me,
She was buzzin' all over me,
She was buzzin' all over me like she was in love..."

I've spent the entire day watching Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares... the entire season. I've got about 2 1/2 episodes to go, but yes I will finish them tonight.

I have been in love with Gordon since the first season of Hell's Kitchen aired here. He's like the Simon Cowell of food... yes, I get that they're both middle aged, British, handsome men... but what I mean is that they both have my undying respect because they tell it how it is. They both are extreemly successful at what they do because of their honesty, bluntness and full throttle desire to get what they want.

I respect that greatly.

Talked to my friend Heather today. She's my oldest friend. I remember the day that we became friends. It was 1st grade and Heather kept trying to ask me something and I kept saying "what?" Because I couldn't hear her... then Mrs. Clark said [for Heather] "Are you going to Girl Scouts after school?!" LOL She was irritated.

And that's how I became best friends with Heather Bellinder and how I got into Girl Scouts...

Heather and I have kept in contact ever since 1st grade and on through when I moved to Kansas City.

Next month Heather is getting married.

I am so happy for her, I was a little late on asking if I could DJ her wedding... so I'm actually playing a more important role... I'll be the photographer.

I am honored to be doing this for my oldest friend. There's hardly a childhood memory that doesn't have her in it. Her family graciously welcomed me into their own family. She was the first person to spend the night at my house and the only reason why I stayed in Wamego as long as I did.

I wish that I could afford to give Heather something greater than my photography skills as a wedding gift. This is one of those moments where I wish I would have worked harder when I was 18 to become a singer and I could give Heather the proper wedding and honeymoon that she deserves.

Heather is the most genuine person that I know. She's truly grounded. She's not fazed by bright lights, Hollywood signs, celeb weeklys... she probably doesn't even care about all that. She cares about what's real in this life. Her fiance, her actual life, her mother, father, brother, sister... all her cousins... etc. She cares about that stuff...

It amazes me really.

I mean, I love my Mama, my Daddy, Mom, Pam, Bella, Jennifer... but that's about it. (I mean, no offense to my other friends; Rae, Gemma, Kristi, etc... I am strictly speaking family here. Take no offense to this.) I don't have a whole load of family. I don't come from a large family. I come from a confusing and fucked up one... but not a big one.

I reckon that's for the better.

Back to my original point: Heather is a honest person and I truly admire her. She loves her family and sticks by them... Meanwhile, I was terrified to tell my family that I was going to LA to do my record... I'm terrified that they'll roll their eyes and won't support me in my dreams.

Speaking of which -- Gemma and I were just talking about this the other day... I got down the other day about things I refuse to discuss for all to see, and Gemma was kind enough to point out that I have made it a lot farther than others have tried to.

I have management. I have a producer. I have fans. I have people who love me and are willing to invest their time and money in what I can do.

To me? I have been pretty successful.

Am I successful enough? No... of course not. When will I be successful enough?

I'll let you know.

xoxox

To be continued.

For Granted

"if the fish swam out of the ocean
And grew legs and they started walking
And the apes climbed down from the trees
And grew tall and they started talking..."

It's fucking HOT today.

Was supposed to go to my Mama's today, but Jennifer took the car so the only way I'll get to see them is if they drive up here and get me or we do something up here.

*sits*

Bella's hot. She's panting. She now has TWO bowls of water. That's how she rolls. She's hot but she's sitting in the sun. That's how she rolls.

It's just too hot to type today. If I think of something else, I'll type something else.

xoxox

Practice What You Preach

"and she knows how to treat a fella right,
Gives me that feeling every night,
Wants to make love when I wanna fight..."

Jennifer and I were discussing our 3/4 year plans today and they're sounding pretty awesome. I won't bore you with the details, because obviously nothings set in stone, but yeah.

Let's see here, what do I have to blog about. Gemma and I are starting a diet together on Monday... we're using the weekend to eat our weight in food. LOL Whoa, that would be a lot for me. ;-) LOL

We both have good, achievable goals and we're doing it together, which is a lot easier than being all alone.

I've been surrounded by good people lately. It's been pretty amazing. Friends have been really good to me the past couple days. It's just a few select people, but you know what my Mom and Dad taught me? Quality not quanity.

I definitely have quality friends.

I really don't know what to say on my blog anymore, it's not for lack of content, I've got a million things I'd love to talk about!!! I just am not stupid... ;-)

Today I went and looked at Yorkies at the pet store. I really hate the idea of a pet store, but there's no breeders around here that have them available. I reckon I should keep looking. I found a beautiful little girl who was so light and adorable. She gave me kisses and broke my heart. I just don't have the $1599 to get her!!!

And, don't tell Jenn, but I think there's a lot more important stuff to spend our money on. LOL I know, when did I grow up?? I still want a dog in July like I was promised, but not one that costs both arms and legs.

I napped a while today, and had a dream that Kristi was going to buy me a $100,000 purse... ?? Odd much? I really wanted to go to NKOTB with Kristi but she's getting VIP (which I don't blame her for. I was a HUGE NKOTB fan, but there was no one that was a bigger fan than Kristi!!!) and I just don't have that money right now. I reckon I'll just be there and be happy about it. Going alone... Jenn's a pisser. I'm going to buy ALL the merch.

I think I'm going to schedule myself to buy a purse next month. Someone remind me.

Oh! Jennifer and I are getting gold passes to Worlds/Oceans of Fun! It's $110 you get a season pass to both parks and parking included. I mean, each park is like $40 and parking is like $15... so if you just went to each once it would pay for itself... but who does that?!?!?! We're going to go like every week. LOL

Jenns wanted this for YEARS... but really, I don't care for either park. They're really lame now, but ehh, it's something to do. I can always lay out and get crispy at Oceans of Fun.

You want to know something just WRONG? I haven't bought a new swimsuit since... wait for it... 03. Yeah, I think this is the year of the new suit. Definitely. I'll make sure I get a new one soon. Perhaps next month with my purse!

It's a little over 4 months until Vegas!!

-STOPS-

Whoa.

Lets say that again... it's a little over 4 months til Vegas.

Wow. That's fucking close.

Yeah, I'm glad we're starting that diet Monday because I need to stop being huge. It's really nasty and gross.

Leticia is going with us for the whole week and it's going to be practically a STEAL for all three of us! I can't wait! Leticia is going to LOVEEEEEEE Vegas. What's not to love?

I definitely decided something when I was in LA. I thought I would LOVEEEEEEE LA more than Vegas, but no. Vegas is way better than LA. Flashing lights and ding ding ding ding dings??? Oh yes please. Free booze and legal gambeling 24-7??

Yeah. Which would you pick?!? LOL Don't say LA.

I think I know the title of my album. :-)

Alright... I'm done for today. I'll try and get back into the daily thing.

Peace.

xoxox

No pic for you.

Gays VS Straights: The Real Debate

(I have the beginning of a migraine, so I'm going to try to make this quick. Plus I need to kill some time.)

I was lucky enough to be in California the day that they overturned the ban on gay marriage, and I was just having a lovely debate over at YouTube on the basics of gay marriage.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=yj2GOfMJQSg

Here's how it's gone:

apta216 (A):
akward....i think gay love is diffent then straight love...being gay is unaturel.its a evolved genitic flaw.some people are born with it.but love between a man in a women is like chemistry. being gay is not wrong, but they miss out on real love, they just know cuz they are gay.....get it. its like loving eating bolgina sandwiches everyday and not knowing how a steak tastes like.

heiress89 (H):There are many people who will disagree with you. Are you saying that because my Mom is in a relationship with a woman that she doesn't know what love is? My Mom has been with women and men and love is love. She loves differently than some people but she deserves the same rights as everyone. She should not be discriminated against because of who she is in love with. She can't help it, it's not "un natural" its just different than other people and some don't accept it. Kills me people think that.

A: everyone missed my point,when you think of evolution,survival of the fittest, gay people are not devoloping the human race,being gay is not wrong, but it is a flaw, from genitics. random. sinse man and a women must have sex to create new life, people of the opposite sex have stronger feelings for each other. if your not gay, how do you know what gays feel and how do gays no what st8 people feel. my reason and logic concludes, gay love is duller then st8 love.

H: first of all, how old are you? You are worthless at spelling. Secondly, you've never felt gay love, how do you know that it isn't more powerful than straight love? You will never know. Yes, we understand that it's something genetically that makes gay people gay, but to say that their love is duller? That's not right. LOVE IS LOVE. That's all there is. Straight, gay, everywhere in between, if you love someone, you love someone - and those people should all have the same rights.

A: i am 19. my brother is gay, i dont shun him.its like trying to arugue that dwarf are effeceint then normal people.dwarfs ,are not. the gay gene is a flaw.sceince says, you have to have sex with the opposite sex, gay love is like more like a strong freindship.the bodys are designed for sex, the penis is designed to go into the vagina to deposit sperm, and it is supposed to feel good, buttholes are not designed for weiners.and tounges are meant for tasteing food and talking.

H: How would your brother feel about you calling him "flawed" just because he's not like you? Just because someone is different than you doesn't mean that it's wrong, and just because they aren't having sex like a straight person doesn't mean that it's wrong. I wasn't saying you don't love your brother, but you clearly think there's something wrong with gay people. They aren't dwarfs, they don't have twisted spines, they're just gay. They're the same, just gay.

A: it is a flaw, its liking having the urge to eat poop.gay sex is nasty.i dont wanna put my wiener in a anis.wtf nastyi have good genes , for creating babies.i am not macho, i hate sports and i like fashion.but i dont have the gay gene flaw.i am not saying theynare wrongits just a flaw.i dont hate people , just because of a gene

H: You don't need to be so childish -- you're comparing gay people to eating poop, being a dwarf and having a twisted spine. How about comparing them to yourself. Stop saying that it's a "flaw" just because it's different from you. My Mother isn't flawed, your brother isn't flawed, they're perfect and beautiful and deserve the same rights that everyone else -- including dwarves -- have. That's the original debate here. And, if in fact it is a flaw, it's nothing like eating poop.

A: i am not for or against gays.gay people did not choose to be born gay.it is genitics.the proper human would desire sex from the opposite sex to create life, to carry the species.gays should not feel bad, but it is a genitic mistake. like somebody being born with a twisted spine, its not wrong, but it is not good for evoultion because that person could not hunt.

H: a "proper" human? Why is it that everyone makes gay people sound like they're a different species? People are people and it's not a "genetic MISTAKE" they're just different from you. Just because a gay couple can't naturally procreate doesn't mean that's a bad thing. I think the world is overpopulated to begin with, so why do we need couples who can create more children? We don't. They're not flawed or broken just because they're not like you.

Here's basically the point I was trying to make:

My Mama isn't flawed. Yes, I believe that being gay is predetermined into your DNA when you're a baby, but I don't believe it's a flaw, I believe it's like what color eyes or hair you will have... it's just what your sexual orientation will be. I actually hope that when I have few children that at least one of them will be gay. I think gay people are wonderful, they have this natural fire in them to achieve fairness in life.

Basically I have 2 points that I want to make here, I only have 2.

Gay people are no different than straight people, therefore they deserve the same rights.

and, being gay is not a "flaw" just because it's different.

There's no reason that just because my Mama was born different that she shouldn't be able to freely marry who she loves and have the same rights as I have.

If someone said that all people who had green eyes were "flawed" and that they weren't allowed to do WHATEVER... I would fight for it... maybe I don't want to do WHATEVER, but I want to be ABLE to do it if I want to do it. Does that make sense?

Gays are the minority, just like people with green eyes. So just because it's not the norm doesn't mean that it's wrong. My genetics decided that I would have green eyes just like they decided that my Mama was going to be gay.

There will be a day when my children will come to me and say "is it really true that gay people weren't allowed to get married when you were younger?" and I will tell them, "yes, but aren't you glad the world has evolved since I was young?"

Just like we look back now and can't believe that blacks were segregated from whites, that women weren't allowed to vote, it's ridiculous to say that gay people shouldn't be able to get married.

When people talk about how different gay people are from straight people I just can't help but think of all my gay friends, of my Mother and Pam... they're not DIFFERENT, they're still people, they still love -- the same love -- they still bleed and cry. Just because they love a way you're not used to, doesn't make them any different or wrong.

I understand that I used the word "different" in my debate with the tool box on youtube, but sometimes it's the only way to explain it... I mean their LOVE is different, because it's obviously same sex, not opposite -- but them as people aren't any different.

I'll fight for equality for EVERYONE until the day I die... Human is human, blood is blood, love is love.



xoxox

I'm Kicking Asses...

"Well I learn to love myself
and I don't need no one else
and when love moves on as it gets cold
well then love moves in and it can fill the hole,
well I'm one more hopeful lying on the bedroom floor,
no sense trying,
When the whole thing drops, you lose your nerve,
I hope you get what you deserve..."

Music is not a democracy.

That's just one of the many things I learned on my trip to LA. The trip was absolutely fantastic, and although Fortune and I had one actercation while recording, he informed me it was the norm for musicians working together. The rest of the week went perfectly.

I didn't end up doing my vocals (for 5 songs!!!!) until the day I left for home, I just knocked them out one after another... it was pretty sweet.

Here's the songs that we did and a short synopsis of them.

"What's Wrong With You" - obviously my signature song, I think you know this one by now, Girl who takes advantage of another girls trust, completely ruins her life and all you want to say to her is "What is wrong with you?!?!!"
"Treat Me Right" - a song about loving a guy because he treats you probably better than you deserve to be treated. He does everything at the right time, and always says the right things. He's perfect.
"Shark" - Some of y'all have heard Shark before, it's about a guy being a playboy. He's the opposite from the Treat Me Right guy. He's the guy that says you'll share the rest of your life together and he'll buy you a mansion in Malibu just to sleep with you and he ducks out after he gets what he wants.
"Empty" - Empty is about the girl who knows she's better than the guy, she knows she's awesome and that's why he's with her, but in the end she finds out that he was using her just like she was using him.
"Mommy" - My life in all the words I've never been able to say.

Truth?

You won't be hearing the songs for a little while to come. Fortune's going to continue working on them in LA (since I won't up and move there like he keeps BEGGING me to!) and then he's going to come to KC to do the absolute final vocals.

The flight home I had was delayed an hour, that's alright though - I love airports. I got a Starbucks and got online, I was sitting across from this boy and girl, maybe a little younger than I am, and we bonded after someone was fucking with LAX's PA system -- something about the Lakers and the Spurs. It was pretty fucking funny!!

Then I called Jenn to talk to her after my David won American Idol and I said "something something Archuletta" and the girl gasped and without hesitation I said, "David Cook won." and she was like "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" because her brother or boyfriend wanted to wait and see it. I felt just absolutely awful. Seriously. It's all I could think of for the next half hour.

Then when I finally got on the plane (another row all to myself! Just like the way there, that was sweet.) I told the flight attendant man -- which, by the way, I always like to see male flight attendants, maybe they're gay or maybe they're secure with who they are enough to work in a predominately female industry -- anyhow, I told the flight attendant man that I wanted 2 glasses of Chardonnay, but not at the same time and he laughed. Now, this is the part where the flight attendant (female) asked for my $$$ on the going flight. He didn't.

After my 2nd glass, I tried to ante up and pay my $8. He said, "I won't take all of this, I'll just take $3" and he left my $5. I graciously thanked him. I love free booze.

While I was xanaxed and boozed I was feeling pretty freaking good and I was listening to my iPod, in which case I stumbeled upon Matchbox 20 and then began to cry my eyes out thinking that Rob Thomas wrote every song for me.

Songs that were written for me and what part gets me.

MB20: Bright Lights
"I've got a hole in me now, yeah I've got a scar I can talk about
and she keeps a picture of me, in her apartment in the city
Some things in this world, man they don't make sense,
Some things you don't need until they leave you, them the things that you miss
Baby, baby, baby
When all your love is gone, who will save me from all I'm up against out in this world
Maybe, maybe, maybe
You'll find somethings that's enough to keep you,
But if the bright lights don't recieve you
You should turn yourself around and come on home..."

MB20: Hand Me Down
"Someday they'll find your small town world on a big town avenue
Gonna make you like the way they talk, when they're talking to you
Gonna make you break out of you shell, cuz they tell you to,
Gonna make you like the way they lie, better than the truth
They'll tell you everything you wanted someone else to say,
They're gonna break your heart...
From I've seen, you're just one more hand me down,
Cuz no one's tried to give you what you need
So lay all your troubles down,
I am with you now."

MB20: Back 2 Good
"This don't mean that, you own me, well
This ain't no good, in fact it's always hell
Ya but things worked out just like you wanted to
If you see me out, you don't me, try to turn your head
Try to give me some room
I'll figure out just what I'm gonna do..."

MB20: You Won't Be Mine
"Take your head around the world, and see what you get, from your mind
Write your soul down word for word, see who's your friend, and who is kind,
Well it's almost like a disease, and I know soon you will be, over the lies,
You'll be strong, you'll be rich in love and you will carry on
No you won't be mine..."

They're were all written for me for different reasons, some about my love, some about just me. It's complicated the way he sings to me. Rob Thomas is a truly amazing song writer.

Anyhow, my love for Rob Thomas is another story for another day.

When I landed I was so happy to see Jennifer and Bella. I totally broke down and cried and then bawled like a little baby when Bella kissed me and was wagging so hard. Before I left she wouldn't give me kisses and then she saw me and she was so happy.

I have the biggest soft spot for that little Chihuahua!

What else can I put here? Jenn and I had a good day today... she loved all her gifts I got her from LA. I got her a travel mug, t-shirt, sea shells I picked up, post card (KIWI!) and Fortune got her a keychain! She loved all of them... I feel like I'm forgetting something...

Pic of the Day:


Jennifer and I sent in our payments for our uniforms today for the Justin Timberlake Shriners Hospitals for Children Open today. Justin was seriously right, that's the longest name ever. Hell, Timberlake takes up half of that!

We're VERY excited for our week with Justin!

xoxox

What Are You Sinking About?

"If you see us in the club,
We'll be acting real nice,
If you see us on the floor,
You'll be watching all night..."

Stayed up until 530a last night creating "Shark". I played "Shark" and "Empty" for Fortune to see which he wanted to be the 4th song and he said "Now you have 5." He loved them both so much that he wanted them both.

Today we're doing final vocals, although it's 3p and I still have yet to see the inside of the vocal booth. I have to mail my postcards today and Fortune said that we could possibly go to Rottweiler Beach... I think we should... I think today should be when we go to the beach at sunset. Yes. I will tell Fortune.

Today's Fortune's birthday!!! Happy Birthday Fortune!!! :-) You'll remember this day when you get your Grammy. ;-)

I think I'm going to go pressure Fortune to let me in the booth. I'm ready.

xoxox

Part Two For Today: Music Is.

Music Is.

A short essay by Jodie Platz

Music is sex
Music is loud headphones
Music is roadtrips
Music is 1, 2, 3, 4

Music is scores
Music is soundtracks
Music is work
Music is play

Music is pink
Music is black, white and every shade of gray
Music is tears
Music is laughter

Music is here
Music is there
Music is in everything and everywhere
Music is love

Music is life.

xoxox

Secret O' Life

"dreamin' doesn't do no good,
Cuz I don't wanna lie
That I'm okay and I'm alright,
I'd rather take it and forget it...
Consider this a warning"

Oh, life, life, life... it never gets any easier does it? Just when you think you're coasting along a great road, you hit a speed bump or two, perhaps you're unlucky enough to hit a pot hole and now and then you don't see the construction signs and fall into an open sewer grate.

That was a pretty good analogy off the top of my head.

Well, I'm not sure where I'm at on this road of life, but I've just maybe curb checked myself and scratched my brand new tires a bit. It's not a big problem, just a bit of an inconvinence.

You know what's really awesome here. Everyone here knows what I'm talking about except for you. That's funny. Makes me laff.

So I have a question for you, though... answer it.

Do you constantly live in fear? Is that why you do the things you do to me? Because you know that I could destroy you as a person? That must be it. Either you're living in fear of me, absolutely jealous of me or you're just really mentally challenged. I can't decide which, but it might be all of them.

This didn't start out as a bashing blog, and I'm not really bashing, if you'll read... I'm just pondering aloud onto my blogspot. :-)

Ahh, LA is still wonderful, although -- I never thought I'd hear myself say this -- I am beginning to miss the Missouri weather. LA is the same everyday. So predictable.

Went down to Hollywood today and blew a shit load of money on things I don't need. It was great!!! Went to In-N-Out, it was packed. The burger, although I don't eat meat so I got no meat -- was great!!! The fries sucked tho. The place overall was overrated. I'd go back, just because it's cheap and cute and the burgers were pretty tasty. Not so friendly service however. The mexicans didn't seem to happy to be working there... I say, be happy you're not begging for change on the street and serve those damn burgers!!!

Tonight we're finishing "Treat Me Right" and starting another song. Fortune wants a club banger and what Fortune wants, Fortune gets... so I reckon I won't get to record "Lost" this time... LOL I'm thinking of a song called "Burn" that's the one I really want... but I don't know if that's up to his par yet... Perhaps "Shark" (which Jennifer hates... LOL) or "Empty" I'd go for any of the 3.

Oh, I think I need a nap. Tomorrow is going to be a long day for me... laying vocals to all 4 songs... then Wednesday night I leave... gots to be at the airport at 430-5ish.

"Back on top again,
Looking out for myself once more
I'd turn around so you can show me the knife
But instead I'll show you the door."

xoxox

Warm In California

"Didn't anybody know?
Didn't tell anybody else that I was gonna go
Didn't anybody see?
Didn't tell anybody else that I was leavin'
Didn't anybody cry?
Didn't tell anybody else that I was gonna die..."

Fortune doesn't have air... it's kinda warms here. It's not that bad tho... haven't been dying or anything, there are just certain parts of the day that are kinda warm.

So I reckon this is the blog y'all have been waiting for? Well I'm not sure if there's anything to say, really.

I am enjoying California, although I didn't go outside once yesterday. LOL Also I didn't work... you'd think I didn't go outside because I didn't work, but nope. LOL Fortune was busy with other clients yesterday and then he had a show last night... so I was left to my own devices, which means that I just talked to Gemma for over 11 hours, watched Superbad, Ferris and Nemo and then went to bed.

The next few days are going to be all music. With the exception of taking a break tomorrow and going back down to Hollywood so I can blow the rest of my money on souvineers. ;-)

Got to talk to my Mama yesterday and I told her everything that has happened here so far and she had to go and make me cry when she told me that she was proud of me for doing this and following my dream. God I hate her sometimes...

Then I talked to Pam, who's a musician so she has more insight into all this than my mama, and Pam didn't do a whole lot of talking, but she did a lot of listening, which was really good for me. Pam also was very proud of me for not selling out, or selling myself short.

Fortune and I had a blow out about lyrics and whatnot and I stood up for myself and my lyrics and she was really proud of me for that.

Today Fortune and I are finishing a song and starting a new one... tomorrow we're finishing the one we start today and we're going to start laying final vocals on Tueday and we HAVE to be all finished by Wednesday because... well, I'm leaving!! I need to be at the airport at 4:30-5ish to get through everything...

I took a couple vids of Fortune doing his thang for my documentary and passed them back to Nicole... she's gonna make another snippet and load it so be looking for that soon!! :-)

Met the ocean and the Hollywood sign... was the highlight o' life.

I'm so done... I really have nothing else to say...

Loads of pics to come later.

xoxox

Leaving On A Jet Plane

I'm going to California, to live in the summer sun,

The streets are made of silver, I'm like a rabbit on the run

I'm going to California, there's a better life for me

Going to California, I'll write and tell you what I see

One: Panic Attack

Two: Times I've Cried.

Forty: More Minutes.

I'm scared out my ever loving mind.

Gonna pop a xanax when I get on board, gonna have a glass of wine and buzz the whole way there... There's beer for sale about twenty feet from me, but how bad does that look at nearly 7a?? LOL

Music seems to be calming me down, even though I'm listening to my Hollywood playlist. Wanna know what's on it?

Going to California - Pink

California - Phantom Planet

Californication - Red Hot Chili Peppers

(this dude totally came a sat by me when there's a thousand others... weirdo.)

Hollywood - Madonna

California - Dre

All I Wanna Do - Sheryl Crow

More Bounce In California - Soul Kid #1

California Dreamin - DJ Sammy

Miss California - Dante Thomas

Under The Bridge - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Crazy - Aerosmith

Steve McQueen - Sheryl Crow

Say Goodbye Hollywood - Eminem

Dani California - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Tragic Kingdom - No Doubt

Hotel California - Eagles

Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley (has nothing to do with CA or LA, but makes me think of the OC.)

Cold In California - Ingram Hill

Catalyst - Anna Nalick

Go DL all those songs. Listen with me.

xoxox

Less Than 24 Hours

"Say you're leaving on a 730 train
And that you're heading out to Hollywood..."

Gemma pointed it out to me yesterday that if you switch 'train' to 'plane' it's like, SO me because I'm leaving at 730a, actually. :-)

Bella won't stop barking. Making me madddd.

Jenn and I got in a fight. She was mixing the dye for my hair and got some on her shirt, so she was paying attention to her shirt and not to the fact that she spilled a whole shit load of my dye... I got mad, of course, because I have a shit load of hair and she could care less that she spilled a lot of it, and she got mad back -- for like, no reason.

All I'm thinking is great, that's what I need right before I leave.

Bella is still barking.

I have quite a lot to do today.

Finish typing lyrics
Pack
do my nails and toes
straighten my hair
...and I can't remember what else because its in my phone and that's in the living room.

Also I'm going to need a nap.

I hope I don't forget anything... A week is a long time to be away from my family, and even if I'm mad at Jennifer now, i still will miss her -- and I'll miss Bella so much.

Pic of the Day:



LOL

xoxox

Bottles of Bud, They Spin On The Floor (2)

"This ain't no disco, ain't no country club either,
This is LA..."

Plans'o'the Day:

Laundry, dye my hair, perhaps clean the living room, straighten up my room, try and get some sleep because I know I ain't getting any tomorrow.

I had the absolute weirdest dream last night. At first I didn't think it was a dream, I thought I was still awake and I was just fantasizing in my head -- I tend to do that before bed, but nope, it was actually a dream.

So I was climbing this black ladder, straight up the side of a white building. There was nothing else around me, I was just climbing for what seemed like forever... finally I reached the top and peeked over what now appeared to be a home, with Justin Timberlake sitting and playing the piano in the shirt I met him in (met him for 2nd time in, the one where I have my picture with him.) He stopped playing and turned to me and said, "oh hi, this is where we can meet when we can't... in your dreams."

He helped me over the rail and I was inside his beautiful rooftop house, I ran over to a photograph that I liked and he came over and told me the artist, then he showed me other photographic art and I wrapped my lil paw around his waist. We shared our love for art and music, and then he turned on me and started to chase me through the house. It was like he was trying to kill me...

I tried to escape and I faked my escape and ran into the back bedroom while he was distracted thinking I got away. In the back bedroom I found a woman watching TV, I then tried to escape out a tiny bathroom window, but Justin caught me and then was mad at his apparent girlfriend.

I then made a caesar salad in a bag while they argued.

Completely strange, yes?

I think I'm still tired, but I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep anymore. I think I'll nap later.

Pic of the Day:



I love his laugh.

xoxox

It's Still An Obsession... (3)

"Take my picture by the pool,
Cuz I'm the next big thing,
Beverly Hills...
that's where I want to be..."

What a wonderful day it is today. Seriously... wonderful weather. Happy Mama's Day, btw, to all the Mama's out there! Bella gave me extra special kissies.

Today has been eventful so far... I got waxed and got a facial, saw my Mama and had some laughs, but then oddly - as I left her house and began to drive home I started to get very depressed.

I came home and wrote a letter and although I might feel a little better now, I'm still slightly depressed. Speaking of which, my Mama gave me some St. John's Wart, which is supposed to help depression.

Last night I went against all odds and went against the norm for me and I got all of my clothes together that need to be washed for LA. Yes, I actually did pre-packing!!! Go me! In fact, I actually put shoes and purses into a suitcase!! Of course, I'm wondering how I'm going to get all my clothes into one suitcase and still have room for makeup and hair products, but I reckon I'll figure it out.

Still have to finish my lyrics... STILL.

Talked to Fortune and the itenerary for LA looks incredible! I'm so stoked! Can't wait to make our Grammy moment. ;-)

Still got tons to do, thus the short blog.

Pic of the Day:



More true than ever.

xoxox

They Wanna Know... Who's That Girl? (4)

"Do you know that it gets cold in California?
Well I guess I miss my home, in Tennessee,
Be sure to bring your coat to California,
When you come find me..."

I don't think I'll have that problem, this Wednesday it's supposed to be 77 and mostly sunny in LA. ;-)

It's crazy the precipitation expectation on weather.com for LA. For most of the days it's a 0% chance of rain, others is 10 or 20%... Today on Kansas City's it says its an 80%... just to put things in perspective. Mostly sunny and 68 on Wednesday when I leave for LA... but I won't get to see it because I'm leaving so bright and early the sun wont be up! LOL

I've got my David Cook on repeat. I adore the studio versions of Day Tripper and Billie Jean... he's just amazing.

I started coughing this morning... that's not good. I knew that something would happen and I would get sick. I'm trying so hard not to be.

So I have to work at McD tonight... I really want to quit, but ah, it's just fucking two days and then I get to go to LA, you know? And I might as well work so I can continue to have insurance and a few bucks in two weeks... Jenn's moving to days for the month of June and I guess I won't be working at McD then because I cannot stand the day crew. I refuse to work with them. Then when she goes back to nights over after she's certified then I think I'm going over to mornings at her other McD... we'll see. I just have to get through a little bit more. That's all I tell myself.

I'm getting Madonna the first week of June! YAY! I'm so happy!

I think I'm tired and I need a nap.

Pic of the Day:



xoxox

EDIT: yeah, no... I decided to quit. 2 days a week isn't fucking cutting it for me. I don't get outta bed for less than $250 a week.

Together We Cry... (5)

"Sometimes I feel like I don't have a partner,
Sometimes I feel like my only friend
Is the city I live in,
The City of Angels..."

Oh, it's been a long, long day. So last night I didn't go to bed. I stayed up and was watching ABC online and then I took Jennifer to work around 4a because I wanted the car to go see David Cook while he's home...

So I get back home and I'm completely irritated that my screen saver didn't kick on after ten minutes like it's supposed to... so my comp was just sitting there for like an hour... retarded... So then when I got home I watched Ugly Betty and Grey's Anatomy and Grey's got over at 820 and David's thing in Westport was scheduled for 9a. I had a hard time driving home because I was so tired, and I barely made it through Grey's, but when the show finished I thought, well -- I can go or I can go to bed. He's just here for one day... so I left the house at 820a.

(Had gotten up at 1130a Thursday)

So it was sprinkeling and kinda cold, but I was too lazy to go back upstairs and get my jacket, so I just headed down to Westport. When I got down there he was just about to do his Mix 93 interview and I was the 3rd person to get to the stage area and I was in the front row.

On the Mix website it said that he would do an acoustic set of just a few songs, but when he finally got there he didn't sing at all. I taped his arrival and his speech, which you can see over at my YT page: www.youtube.com/heiress89

He's gonna be a good celebrity. The girls next to me asked for a photo and his bodyguard said "no photos, no time..." and David said, "I can take one photo!" I love it when celebs do that. It really makes you feel like they WANT it.

So David signed autographs for everyone and only took pics with me and the chicks next to me and then he was gone. It was quick but worth it.

I headed home and managed to get my feet up the stairs, I got home a little after 10a and had to get up at 12 to go pick up Jennifer from work... When my alarm went off I was less than happy, but of course, managed to get out of bed. I got down to the car, barely, and off I went to go pick up Jennifer. I was so tired that I missed the exit and went about 7 miles past it before turning around, then the exit I needed - there wasn't one North bound, so I had to go even further back North and then turn around AGAIN! Finally I got there, actually not that late, even for being late.

When Jennifer and I got home I fucking crashed and didn't wake up until 7p.

Only 5 days left until LA. Still have lots to do and haven't gotten through all of my lyrics. That's on my list of shit to be done by Monday. Tuesday my Mama is cutting my hair and waxing my eyebrows... can't wait! I reckon Sunday or Monday I'll dye my hair again.

Can't think. I'm still too tired.

Pic of the Day:

http://i26.tinypic.com/rm72bk.jpg

David and I -- too lazy to downsize it. Enjoys.

xoxox

She's Not Me -- 6

"California, knows how to party..."

Sorry I didn't get an update in yesterday, it was pretty hectic. I got my check and I was -- well, quite disappointed. I literally have $20 to take to LA with me. Word. Jenn's Western Unioning me some cash the day I get there... ya.

I had 2 photoshoots today... one was great and one was a scratch.

The other day I got a new outfit to go to LA in, I'm pretty stoked, it's cute! I love plane outfits!!!

So the other day I stayed up until 7a because I was obsessing over dead celebrities and their stories of tragically dying in Hollywood. There's the obvious ones, like Sharon Tate, Chris Farley, John Belushi, etc... but then there was one that I'm really obsessed with now.

Peg Entwistle

http://www.franksreelreviews.com/shorttakes/hollywoodland.htm

She commited suicide off the Hollywood sign when she was 24. Tragically amazing. She still haunts the sign today. Incredible. I have no idea why I'm so fascinated with her now. Perhaps because she was amazing and had these incredible hopes for herself and hey, if you can't be famous, be infamous.

"I am afraid, I am a coward. I am sorry for everything. If I had done this a
long time ago, it would have saved a lot of pain. P.E."

I was also fascinated by Dorothy Stratten... but you'll have to read about her on the end of that site link I gave you.

Tomorrow is 5.

Pic of the Day:

My favorite outtake of the day - http://i29.tinypic.com/678u43.jpg

xoxox

So Far Away... (8)

"You always have the biggest heart,
When we're 6,000 miles apart..."

In exactly one week, just as Fortune predicted, it will be one.

I don't have to work until Saturday! Woo! I've got loads to do around here, so it's good that I won't be distracted with work.

I'm thinking so hard on quitting McD. Last night I was about 2 seconds away from walking out, but that would have left Jennifer with literally no crew, and I won't do that to my best friend. Every other manager has it in their heads that I should be doing front line/register and this McD has the "old system" compared to the "new system" that I learned on at the last McD I was at.

The last McD, the register I learned on, had literally like pictures of a Big Mac, for a Big Mac, a picture of pickles, for pickles, picture of a Coke, for Coke, etc... this McD that I'm at now has just page upon page of words.

Now, like I said, I learned on the last register, so Jennfier and I would be like the only two people there who know how to do it when this McD transfers to the "new" one, you know? Well, Jenn told me yesterday that I like, HAVE to learn this register. So yesterday they put me on front counter and every time I had an order it would take me literally close to a minute to find each button... some guy wanted a snack wrap and he should have just ordered a double cheeseburger, I know where THAT button is!! I had to ask Jennifer where the snack wrap button was.

After work I explained to Jennifer why this system is so hard for me. It's basically like school all over again, let me explain this to you.

Some people learn differently than others. I am one of those people. No, I'm not retarded or anything, but I just take a different approach to things. Teachers teach very left brained and I'm naturally a very right brained person. This computer is very left brained and I'm the opposite. Jennifer's good at this register because she's a left brain, I'm good at the other register because I'm right brained.

The blandness of this system (all one color, whole pages of words like a book) activates my ADD and no matter how hard I try to concentrate, the only thing I see is a page of words and none of them really make sense to me.

Sure, with time I will understand the register, but it's probably going to take me longer than they want to give me. I learned the other register in a day. It's just all about the way I learn.

I totally just made myself sound retarded, but whatever.

So I was thinking about quitting... then this white trash bitch went on break and I got to do window and "present" the food and I was instantly happier.

I'm thinking about getting on at Jennifer's other McD too... just a thought. ;-) Maybe I'll stay on one or two days at this one just for my insurance.

Pic of the Day:

Naw... two tomorrow.

xoxox

*burp* (9)

"It's those changes in lattitudes,
Changes in attitudes,
Nothing remains quite the same,
All of our running
and all of our cunning,
If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane..."

Well, it seems that time isn't slowing down, yeah, that seems to be the problem. Only 9 days until I leave for LA. I'm not really sure what to make of that. Perhaps I'm too in my head about it all.

There was once a time when it was 45 days until LA--and somehow all that time went away and now it's only 9. As Fortune said, someday it'll be just 1 day.

Yesterday Jennifer called Southwest for me to see how many bags I'll allowed before they charge me. I was so scared, but luckily I'm allowed to have 2. *rolls eyes* I was really hoping it would be 3. Really.

I have a 3 set of suitcases and I don't think I'm ever going to get to use my cute little one. But hey, 2 is better than just one!! I really would never be able to get my life into one suitcase.

Now, I'm just worrying about carry on. I usually take my Victoria's Secret bag, which is huge, and you're allowed a purse too -- ooh, I should buy a new one. Yeah. *writes that down* Anyhow--but since I have my computer, that will be considered my carry on, so then I won't be able to put everything that doesn't fit in my suitcase in my VS bag. Problem. I always have things that wont fit into my suitcase.

I'm nowhere near a light traveler.

Well, I reckon I won't have any choice but to buy some big cute purse and then stuff a whole bunch of shit in there.

I just work tonight and then I have off until Saturday. Then I work Saturday and Sunday and have Monday and Tuesday off and then Wednesday... well, you know what Wednesday is.

Pic of the Day:



I don't think it's been THAT long since I've been on one a dem flying machienes, but I haven't seen many giraffeees.

xoxox

It's Like Over & Over (10)

"Loving you didn't seem wrong yesterday
But that's because I didn't know her name,
And loving you ain't just a game,
When it doesn't bother you who's in first place..."

My favorite parts are when he sings Whoa-whoa...

M: you're pushing me right down to the floor -
J: oh, whoa - whoa...
M: I should just walk away, over and over, you keep on coming back for more -
J: oh, whoa - whoa...

OH. I love it.

I think I need a bath today.

I can't believe it's ten days. I'm kinda freaking out... actually.

I worked last night, it was alright -- I finally got the new shoes I ordered when I started! They're super cute!

I work tonight and tomorrow and then I'm off until Saturday. Then I work Saturday and Sunday and then I'm off Monday and Tuesday (thank God,) and then Wednesday morning, I leave.

OMG.

It just keeps getting closer, doesn't it? How do I make that stop?

I really shouldn't be telling you all my fears and insecurities. That's not good for me. I told Jennifer that I was scared of failing and she did a good thing to say, "get that out of your head... don't even think like that, failing isn't even an option."

Good Jennifer.

I get paid Wendesday and that will determine how much money I have to bring to LA with me. Thankfully we're not doing much while I'm there because I won't have much money at all... I work like, a day a week and then I get insurance taken out, so ya... I'm gonna have like a $30 check, I fucking see it now. That'll piss me off, actually.

I have to have enough to buy 2 new memory cards at least. When I'm in LA, I promised Jennifer I would bring her something back, and I have to send a few postcards, and I want to get myself a tshirt or something. Mostly, the best souvineer for me is photos -- and from this trip it will be MUSIC.

My mind is going a thousand miles an hour, so I'm not really myself now.

See you tomorrow.

Pic of the Day:



I love I Can Has Cheezburger?

xoxox

Telling Me To Let You Go (11)

"I barely couldn't, I barely couldn't recognize
But I play bad into it, who am I to criticize,
Somehow I get the way and you won't even realize,
Falling through your own disguise,
It's like over and over,
you're pushing me right down to the floor,
I should just walk away,
Over and over,
I keep on coming back for more,
I play into your fantasies,
Now that it's over,
You can lie to me right through your smile,
I see behind your eyes,
Now that I'm sober,
You're more intoxicating than wine,
Even the Devil wouldn't recognize you, but I do..."

I'm not sure if that last line is, "the more intoxicating my mind," or "you're more intoxicating than wine..." I think the wine one is the one I like better, so I'll just pretend it says that.

That's a worry that I have. I think I'm going to always put lyrics in my albums because I would hate if people are singing the wrong words. It would kill me. It completely loses it's meaning that way... and then don't you hate it when you've been singing the wrong words and then one day you realize what the RIGHT words are, or someone tells you, and then all you can think of is that you were singing the wrong ones for forever. I did that with No Doubt's "Don't Speak" -- I won't say which part, but every time I sing it now, I just think about how I sung it wrong half my life.

11 days until LA. Everyone keeps saying to me, "you must be SO excited!!" But the truth is, I'm terrified.

I can't go into more details than that because I have promised all those fears to my documentary, but I'll just tell you that I haven't been this scared in a long time. Tina said yesterday that she would be all packed with her things waiting by the door, ready to go... and I think that's the difference between Scorpio and Sag. Sagittarius' are prone procrastinators and it's not even really that for me -- I don't think there was ever a trip that I prepacked for. I always pack, like, hours before I leave and I continue packing as I'm walking out the door. It's just what I do. It's kind of a trait of mine.

Speaking of packing, I heard that airlines (some, not all... apparently) are charging $25 a bag after the first bag, which is really going to be a problem, because I have 3 bags I need to check and I don't have an extra hundred bucks for this... that would mean that I would have to get EVERYTHING for a week into ONE suitcase.

Let's take a moment to realize what i just said.

EVERYTHING FOR ONE WEEK INTO ONE SUITCASE.

I couldn't even get everything for one DAY into one suitcase for Las Vegas!!! I had to have a bag just for shoes and purses... oh it was a girls dream...

I hope that Southwest hasn't started this or I'm fucked.

Anyhow, last night I worked on my lyrics. It's a very tedious job. I was actually thinking about just typing them up and then printing them off. That would be faster and probably more ledgable.

Ya. *note to self, type lyrics.*

Great, I had thought of this wonderful idea to put them all into one notebook and then no. Crap. Oh well, a writer can never have too many notebooks, right?

Last night when I was pointlessly writing my lyrics into a notebook, I was also organizing my planner... I scheduled 4 photoshoots and reminded myself of things to pack. See, I'm good at that -- PostIts are what I'm good at. Not packing.

When Jennifer got home yesterday we drove around to survey the damage by the storm, and at 70th and N. Oak (Like I said yesterday, I live at 69th -- so this is one block East from me --- LIKE ONE BLOCK, OKAY??) there was a building completely torn apart... Completely gone. Tell me that that was just wind??? No, that was a tornado and the sirens didn't go off... so when my furniture was levitating -- that was from a tornado. Okay??

Fucking scary.

Pics of the Day:

(links because they're too large to load to here and I'm too lazy to upload them -- they will load in same window -- either right click, open in new window -- or just arrow back to my page.)

http://i31.tinypic.com/1197csn.jpg
Blockbuster's roof came apart.

http://i25.tinypic.com/ohlpwy.jpg
Check cashing place's sign is half gone.

http://i32.tinypic.com/2vdo49e.jpg
Margarita's Mexican restaurant won't be open for at least a month, is what they're saying. It got substantial damage to it's roof.

http://i30.tinypic.com/6paglf.jpg
Margarita's again...

http://i32.tinypic.com/296hpva.jpg
This was once a pawn shop... Seriously.

http://i30.tinypic.com/2i8ueed.jpg
Pawn Shop again -- 70th and N. Oak -- a block away from my home... Sirens didn't sound... Scary!

http://i25.tinypic.com/28bxhyu.jpg
Pawn Shop again... the sky is eerily calm...

http://i27.tinypic.com/1r4s45.jpg
Some minor tree damage. Minor compared to some other photos!

http://i27.tinypic.com/28l77s2.jpg
A large tree snapped in half - at least they made some good firewood!

http://i29.tinypic.com/2na3c5t.jpg
A huge tree literally uprooted... this like, amazes me that tornados can do this.

http://i32.tinypic.com/2j3ptmh.jpg
I hope they had full coverage.

And the areas where it was worst, like houses blown into bits, that area was closed off... so it gets even worse than this.

xoxox

Tornada [sic]

"Take your head around the world
See what you get, from your mind
Write your soul down word for word
See who's your friend and who is kind
Well, it's almost like a disease
And I know soon you will be
Over the lies
You'll be strong
You'll be rich in love
and you will carry on
No you won't be mine..."

Last night was crazy. I'll start from the beginning. I asked Jennifer when she got home from work if she wanted to go for a drive and get some ice cream with the Bella. She said sure and then we sat on the couch a little longer... she said "do you want to go soon? Because it's going to rain..."

So we left and we had to go down to Northtowne to get gas, and I was going to surprise her by taking her to Dairy Queen. So we're in the car for just a little bit and Bella won't stop whining!!!! She was being so obnoxious. She loves rides, so I had no idea why she was crying...

So we get gas and ice cream and then I head out on the drive. When we were down in Westport we stopped for some fries at Sonic (Nice healthy dinner, eh?) and Bella was still crying, so I decided to head home.

On our way back home she was crying harder and it started to rain. When we got back home Jennifer ran upstaires to take the Bella inside because she was being a brat and get the movies we had rented.

We took them back (like 5 minutes away) and as she's coming out from dropping off the movies, the sirens go off.

Now, we live on the 3rd floor of a shitty apartment and we don't have a basement or any secure place to go when there's a tornado. So our plan has always been, if the sirens go off, we go down to the laundry mat and from there if we need to, go into Quik Trip to their freezers.

So I'm speeding home because I don't have my baby and we storm upstaires and start grabbing everything. Cell phone chargers, laptop, I grabbed all my NSYNC photos and my stack of "yes" lyrics and in less than a minute we were out the door.

We head down to the laundry mat (just down the street) and when we get there Jenn's watching the TV and I went to the bathroom. It was while I was peeing staring at Bella in her leopard print dog bag just staring at me back that I realized she had been bothered by the tornado all day. She knew it was coming for hours and she was trying to tell us.

She's a good dog.

So I come out of the bathroom and Jenn tells me that Metro North Mall is in the basement and I asked her if we could just go up there and so then we pack up everything and go up to the mall.

When we get there all of the stores are closed and there's a few people just chilling around and so we sit by the tornado shelter. We're there ten minutes and then they give the all clear.

We went home and watched this past weeks Desperate Housewives and Samantha Who? Jennifer went to bed around 11 and I think it was around 2 that I tried to go to sleep. I lit a candle and had my bedroom window open. I was just thinking... and then all the sudden rain started shooting into my bedroom window! I was taken aback and it took me a second to get to the window. I slammed it shut and then ran to the living room to make sure the sliding door was closed.

It was when I was staring outside at the heavy rain and constant lightning (literally) that the lights flickered out. They soon came back on to then go off for good. The winds were making the trees lean sideways and then out on my patio, our chairs started to levitate.

I screamed and got Jennifer. (Even though she had to be up in an hour...) She went to look at it too and then she tried to get me to go to bed... I made her sleep with me for the rest of the night. I checked the weather on my phone and it was just a tornado watch, but it was until 8a... I tried to stay awake, but I ended up falling asleep.

Woke up this morning, the lights were back on and it was a lot cooler today. The clouds look eerie, however and it's still very windy.

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Weather/story?id=4773373

http://www.kmbc.com/weather/16130580/detail.html - shows just how close last nights chair levitating "winds" were to me. North Oak is 2 streets away. I live about 2 blocks across at 69th/72nd.

"Tornado sirens did not sound. No tornado warnings were issued by the National
Weather Service. A team from the weather service will survey the damage to
determine whether a tornado is to blame for the damage."

Pic of the Day:



Close to me. I don't reckon just "winds" could do that.

xoxox

Do You Think You Can Cope?

"I feel stupid, but it's something that comes and goes,
And I've been changing, think it's funny how no one knows."

It really is true.
Someday I'm going to leave you.
It's sooner than you think,
And it'll happen faster than a blink.

Thirteen days until LA.

I was filming some of my documentary last night after I said it a few hundred times I think I finally believed myself that I'm going to LA. I'm still unprepared and I'm nervous as all Hell. I was so excited at one point and now I think I'm just scared.

Can't tell you why, I reckon you'll have to watch my documentary to see my insecurities.

Jennifer and I have been watching a lot of movies lately. Let's see. We saw: Juno, Disturbia, I Know Who Killed Me, Walk Hard, Vacancy and Blades of Glory all within the last 2 days or so.

Bad ones?? I Know Who Killed Me, Walk Hard and Blades of Glory... Blades was alright and Walk Hard was dumber than I thought. Those are two movies you watch knowing they're going to be retarded, but Walk Hard was more retarded than imagined.

As far as the horrors go... I used to like horror/thriller/slasher films, but somewhere along the way I started hating them. I get TOO scared. My Daddy hates them too.

Juno was really good. I really like Michael Cera...

"I heard that pregnancy can sometimes lead to... an infant..." LOL

I think that's about all I've got to say today. I'm incredibly distracted.

Pic of the Day:



Who's perfect*?

You.

xoxox





*by "perfect", I mean, "to me". Not to say that he doesn't have faults, scars or skeletons, but just to say that I love him entirely for all of that.

Perfect.