Saturday, August 8, 2009

Please Play Again


"When Michael got lobotomized they must have cut his brains connection to his eyes,
Cuz after Michael got lobotomized, Michael went blind..."


I think that I may have to change the title of my blog, yet again... it was titled Everything But Happiness for probably most of 2009... but now that I'm actually happy, I may have to change it.

Before that... well I can't remember if there was anything after the original one before this one... the original title was Day In The Life Of. How original.... I think have a good title for it now... let me know if you like it. It came from a poem of mine.

It's kinda true... the line is "I am a trainwreck, beautiful in my own destructive way, and no one can seem to look away".

That's very true. I know that I'm a trainwreck, I know that I'm destructive. I know that I ruin everything that I touch and I make a constant ass out of myself. I thank god that I didn't make it so big in music that I was photographed by the paparazzi because I already live my life in constant scrutiny from my friends and family, it's not like I need strangers judging and poking as well.

Although, I do tend to handle all that well. And to be honest, I approach everything as if I'm still "famous". I know that I wasn't ever that famous, but once upon a time I had fans and now and then I still get noticed - so to the four people that stalk my blog and wanna tell me that I wasn't ever anybody and that I'm always going to be a nobody, just go fuck yourself, eh? I was signed. You never got signed. (Yeah, it's my fault for fucking that up, but whatever.) I went to LA to record my album, you didn't. So just chill and don't start up on me again, eh?

Back to my earlier point - I still approach everything as if I'm "famous" - I take everything I hear with a grain of salt and I work very hard to keep my name clean and gossip free. Of course, just as when I was "famous", I can't always control the gossip - however if the gossip is true, what is there really for me to control? I can't control people's opinions [unfortunately] so I guess there's nothing left for me to do.

For those that care - there's three photos up on my photo site from the Warped Tour.

Is it freaking October yet? I'm taking hella photos the whole damned month of October. I want it to be October.

Well crap, now all I'm thinking about is October. Excuse me while I day dream about my panties melting...


I talked about October and my panties melting and then I put a picture of Robert... okay, not exactly the best transition I've ever had, definitely a rocky one, but I just wanted to use this picture of Robert cuz he's fucking gorgeous here and I've been thinking about him since THIS post on TEN today. :)

xoxox

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love the title, but not for obvious reasons, I suppose. I love it because it is attached to a poem that came from your soul, where I feel all art originates from.
You are far from a trainwreck to me. I look because I want to, I see you because of your brilliance, your beauty, your amazing ability to stand strong and hold your head high and be an incredible person come what may. I look because I don't WANT to turn away, not because I can't for conventional "trainwreck" reasons.

Regardless of your "fame" you are somebody, you always have been, and you always will be. So, to the 4 people that stalk your blog:

Hey you, yeah you know I'm talking about you. Why don't you grow up, and get a life? It's called jealousy sweetheart, so take a pill and..you know..CHOKE.

You will go far in life, I know you will. You have the passion, the want, the drive, and the ambition. I'm here to give you that little extra push, and I will. Believe me. When the time is right.

As far as gossip, and rumors go.. as long as they're talking about you, they're letting somebody else rest right? Well, I still don't like it. I wish people could find something better to do, though it speaks a ton about us,doesn't it? That our lives are SO important to other people, so interesting that they HAVE to keep up with us.
It's either really amusing, or really pathetic on their part, possibly both.
Anyway, no matter, you hold that beautiful head high, and know that they'd kill to see you fall, but I won't let you. I'll catch you every single time you trip. Promise.

No it isn't October yet dammit, and make sure you bring plenty of panties,you'll need them. Think drinks with you know who!

And BTW Madmartigan looks Freakin' HOT in that pic...and those posts *swoon*
Why couldn't I keep thinking he was sad and stupid?