And So It Continues...

"Born to multiply, born to gaze into night skies, 
All you want's one more Saturday, 
Well look here until then, 
They're gonna buy your life's time, 
So keep your wick in the air and your feet in the fetters, to the day,
We come in doing cartwheels, 
We all crawl out by ourselves, 
And your shape on the dance floor, 
Will have me thinking such filth and gauge my eyes..."

Australia by the Shins, literally my favorite song on the planet.

To pick up where we left off yesterday... grab your cup of coffee and your comfy seat... I hope you've made your bathroom break recently.

The boys arrived at the venue in St. Louis and as they drove around the corner (twice, cuz it was so nice) Jerad gave me a thumbs up. Loves it. :)

[Forgive me as I write this I am doing it without the help of Jennifer... she's working, so I'm just yanking this shit randomly out of my head and it's hard.]

Tin Tin Can opened for 100 Monkeys that night. They are one of my favorite bands on the planet... I do believe by now they are aware of that fact. I gush to them every time that I see them and I was in the front row wearing my TTC shirt, singing every word. :D *happy dance*

They did a fucking outstanding rendition of "Animal Bones" that made me ache. It was awesome.

After the set was over Dustin bent down to give me a hug. Rockface.

Marty and Jackson came on stage to take a photo with the audience for the disposable camera auction and I didn't bid on or win the camera, but whomever did was so kind enough to post the photos online and so tah-dah! I have my 4th photo with Jackson. :)

I edited it, of course... because it was just a crappy disposable camera photo. I am sure this photo will turn out really small on the blog, but on his left wrist you can see the bracelet that I made him. I didn't notice this until last night, actually. The photo was taken before I knew that he was wearing my bracelet that night. :)

The show was beyond incredible. Out of all the 100 Monkeys shows that I have seen to date, this show was the best. (Tulsa the 2nd time around was my 15th show.)

There are many reasons why this show was incredible. For one, it was in Missouri. (Yes, I am just that biased.) Nextly, the boys rocked harder than I have seen them rock in a long time. The audience was great and receptive (in my opinion).

They did my improv suggestion, (Best Friend... for Jerad of course because he is my best friend and we did the bracelet thing earlier that day...) Jackson rocked so hard during Orson Brawl that he busted a guitar string and didn't even miss a beat as he snapped it off. At the end of the song he coiled it around his hand and ripped it off the Gibson and offered it to me, "You want it?" He asked before I even had time to reach out my hand and ask for it. (He knows me so well by now that he knows that I was going to ask for it... he just cut out the middle man. LOL)

That guitar string is now around the rear view mirror of our van to try and make it more rock and roll.

Some of my favorite photos from St. Louis:

My broken guitar string. When we went to the bathroom at the end of the night I cut my finger on it... Strange.

Love this photo too fucking hard.

Check out the rest of the photos on my official site.

At the end of the show, for their encore, the boys came back out and basically had a long ass jam session with Tin Tin Can. (*wet dream*) I taped about 12 minutes of it, but it was fucking long. I went through three batteries that night. (Uh... I only have three batteries for my Canon.)

They jammed, they all changed instruments mid-song, Ben did Champagne & Reefer... it was amazing.

This is my favorite shot from the night.

Jerad and Dustin from Tin Tin Can.

(As Tin Tin Can comes on my iPod. *LOVES*)

The next day was Louisville, however Jennifer couldn't go and so Willow was taking me. After the show Jennifer drove me to the airport in St. Louis. We sat in the car and talked over the whole show, "oh my god" this and "did you see" that. It was amazing.

At that moment I had been up for almost 30 hours and hadn't had anything to eat, now only a Venti Iced coffee and then an iced tea after the show. Oh yeah, and before the concert when we were sitting in line I had a few bites of Lisa's ice cream and like four really shitty crackers plus a bottle of water.

I went into the airport and called Willow, talking to her some while I tried to get my St. Louis photos edited. The plan was to give the boys a DVD of the photos the next day in Louisville, but I was highly overzealous to think I could get ALL those edited in less than 24 hours.

It didn't happen. Actually, I can't remember if I ever gave the boys a DVD of St. Louis now come to think of it. Lord. Nope. I now owe them photos of FOUR shows. *Overwhelmed*

I will pretend that the majority of the next day was a joke about a rope and we'll just skip it. (Heh. Heh. Heh. Thanks Jay.)

I finally got to the concert and got to see Willow and Kasey... by the time the boys went on stage we were in about 2/3rd row-ish. I really didn't think I was going to get that great of photos since I wasn't in the front row. (It was so freaking weird to not be in the first row... Very strange. I didn't like it... but the boys still knew I was there and they could still see me, so it's all gravy.)

During the opening acts I nearly passed out. Exhaustion. Dehydration. Malnourishment... Frustration. If it's possible to pass out from frustration, I would have. There was probably only about 10 Monkeys fans total in the whole place... everyone else was a Twi-tard and there to see "Jasper".

The boys took the stage and I was outraged with the crowds reaction. They were screaming, "Jasper!! Jackson!! Oh my god, oh my god!! Look at me! Jackson! JASPER!!!" I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. I gave Jay an apologetic smile... sending him good thoughts as if to say, "I am so sorry." Jackson was gracious and smiled for the crowd. They went insane...

And then just when I thought that someone screaming "JASPER! JASPER!" was the worst thing that could happen... someone leaned over and asked Willow, "which one Jasper" was.

O_O

I'm sorry, uh... are you having trouble picking out the Twilight "star" in the band because he's not a blonde vampire in real life...?!

If you don't even know what he looks like then I am going to go ahead and say that you SHOULD NOT BE AT A 100 MONKEYS SHOW.

I was livid.

Yeah, yeah... it's great that you liking Twilight made you want to buy a ticket and come out to support the band (not that they give two shits about the band...) but don't you think you should look them up first before you show up...? Just an idea.

I am all for the Twilight fans that admit when they get there that they are there because of Twilight, or flat out tell me that they have never heard the music before; I tell them, "that's awesome that you found the band through Twilight, but by the end of this show you will be a 100 Monkeys fan,"

I digress... (*Willow*)

Like I said earlier, I didn't think I was going to get any good photos that night. Shitty lighting. Shitty placement. Shitty fan attitudes. (Don't even get me started on the asshole with the grubby hands and Jameson...)

However... I did get some good photos. Here's some of my favorites from Louisville:

Don't even begin to pretend like you don't know why I love that one. ;)

We will end the Louisville show with this photo and a story.

When I was in Tulsa for the first time back in January (my first concert of the 100 city tour...) and they played Wings On Fire, I held up my lighter. The boys' faces lit up and they all pointed, sang at me, etc... So then for every show after that for Wings On Fire I hold up my lighter during the chorus.

They never fail to smile when I do it.

(In my mind, if I was in their shoes, I would be thinking something like, "holy shit, someone is holding up their lighter for MY song! WIN!")

So... for Louisville during that photo I was singing, holding up my lighter and I also managed to take that photo. I adore it. It's one of my favorites. :)

I spent two weeks in Kentucky with Willow and Kasey after the Monkeys show... it was fucking amazing. It was so great to get to know Kasey more and to spend so much time with Willow. We went to see Alice In Wonderland together. (Ahmayzingggg...) We talked incessantly, planned things, watched an insane amount of Spongebob, gushed over The Hangover... it was awesome. So relaxing, so incredible... I loved it hardcore.

I finally made it back to Kansas City just a few days before the show here at the Beaumont. This was THE show I had been looking forward to...

KANSAS CITY! 


There was no way that we couldn't be in the first row for Kansas City... I had mentioned to the boys a few times that it was my hometown, how much I loved the venue and how fucking stoked I was for the show there... so we got there fuckearly.

I was getting impatient for the boys to arrive, so I tweeted at them and told them that I missed their faces. Not 30 seconds later the van pulls around the corner, followed quickly by the Scion and Jake's van... Jerad gave me a thumbs up as we waved and they attempted to park. ;)

We gave hellos and hugs and the boys loaded in... afterwards Larry came back out and I gave him my present for the band. (Random fun things... usually I am practical with the boys but I thought they might need a little spring fun care package.) He gave me a huge hug and a kiss, which made my day.

We got our spots and the opening bands seemed to take forever. Probably because I was so anxious to see The Kissing Club and the Monkeys that night. The first band was good... didn't much care for the second band or their tone-deaf lead singer.

Jake came out and I was a happy camper! He. Was. Fuckmayzing. :D He played Spencer's "Nerve Damage" and Lisa and I cried like little babies... the boys came out to help him with it and it was just so overwhelming and amazing...

...When the boys did their tuning and I handed Jay a yellow lighter. He smiled and thanked me, flicking the lighter twice before sticking it into his jacket pocket. One girl turned to Lisa and told her she was jealous that he smiled at me. (*Stifles a giggle... thinking about things...*) Another girl tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Can I ask why you gave Jackson a lighter?" I replied, "Because I give Jay a lighter every time I see him..." Hah.

In perfect amazingness, they opened with Sleeping Giants and he used my yellow lighter as a slide. :) The girls that had inquired about the Bic finally *GOT* it.

Some of my favorite photos from KC:

The KC crowd was very respectful, no pushing... no obscene things yelled... no "JASPER!" mentions... I was really, very proud of my city...

Oh yeah... and hey boys... don't think I didn't notice that you talked about Kansas City more than you've ever talked about ANY of the other cities/shows that I have been to. ;) It was amazing to hear my city come outta your mouths. Now, please come back.

At the end of the night Jennifer asked Jerad for his 100 Monkeys glasses. He said he would give them to her, however, they were his last pair and he needed shades in order to drive... I took off my sunglasses and offered to trade him. He looked at my glasses, smiled and put them on, giving his Monkey glasses to Jennifer...

We said our goodbyes at the van and stuff... had some good moments with the boys and told them we would see them the next day in Tulsa... when they stepped out of the van/Scion/other van in Tulsa they were all smiley and happy as we got hugs/hellos/high-fives. :D It was such a great, simple moment.

Blah, blah, blah...

Uh...

Tulsa was great. I loved it... it was very epic... I don't, however, much care for the crowd in Tulsa. They're always very rude to other fans and super pushy. (In the literal sense.) The boys played a good set, but it was all the small moments that made the show/trip so much more amazing, in my eyes.

I got some great photos... I think some of my best ever, if you ask my very biased opinion.

Here's some shots from Tulsa:

Using the lighter I gave him in KC... which he continued to use through NOLA... or so I hear.

Jake... he reminds me of Johnny Cash.

I am so sick of uploading photos now that you can just check out the rest of them either on my Facebook fan page or my official site. I am so sorry, but it's just been nothing but 100 Monkeys photos for about two weeks straight.

The BFF in the shades I traded. :) At the end of the Tulsa show they somehow spontaneously busted and I felt so bad that he didn't have a pair to drive in that I gave him my white ones. (Favorite pair.) When I talked to him the next day he said they got swiped. :( Mayjah bummer... but I told him I would bring him new shades in Nashville. 

Tulsa was amazing, as I mentioned.

I thank you so much for reading this if you took the time to. I hope it wasn't terribly disappointing. I tried to give more than I usually do. Comments = kisses... passing my blog along to a friend = hugs...  Now get outside and enjoy the weather or a 100 Monkeys show! 

My next show... 19 days away... Nashville. From there I'll follow the boys on through until Legacy. :) 

Which reminds me... 

www.SpencerBellMemorial.com

Rock on, 

Jodie

Long Time No See...

"So here's to all the ties we've tied..."

I know that it's been a long ass time since I've actually blogged here... I've attended many shows since the last time we last saw each other here. Don't worry. I am about to catch you up on ALL of them. (Edit... I only have time tonight to make it through HALF of STL... I am so sorry... I will do the best I can to get everything else to y'all soon... comments might help motivate me. *wink*)

I hope that you have a fucking comfortable seat. Grab yourself a cup of coffee or your preferred beverage and enjoy the read; I hope I don't bore you too much. If you do, however, make it through the entire thing, I would love to hear from you and read some of your feedback.

I have been called out twice on the fact that my posts here are no longer passionate and that they don't seem "genuine". I have to agree with you there. I am sure that y'all (who are perceptive) have noticed a difference in my writing style from when I saw the boys in Nashville (November) to when I saw them in Tulsa the first time (January) and then I am sure the ultimate changes in my writing style came around the Las Vegas time... (late January)

I could actually give you one very specific reason for why that is... I am not going to say it aloud, but if you're smart, you'll figure it out.

I will try to be as honest as possible... I don't mind sharing some of my memories with y'all, however so many of them are so large and special that I wish to keep them to myself and share them with my close friends. (Some of them I don't even share with my close friends... if that tells you anything...)

Memories are something very different for me. I have mentioned before that I don't have the greatest memory. Almost as soon as something happens to me, it leaves me... so I have enlisted my best friend Jennifer to help me out with the details for these previous shows I am about to recall. (Save for Louisville, she wasn't able to attend that one.)

But while on the topic of memories... those that I do remember I can recall perfectly; every touch, scent, emotion... the way a voice rings perfectly in my ear... the words said... sometimes *those* things are what sustain me... what help me press on until my next whatever.

You know... if you go back into my blogs far enough (I believe I started this shit back in 2008...) I was once so blatantly honest because I knew that no one read it. Now, I unfortunately have to censor myself for so many reasons... but like I said, I will try to be as honest as I can and divulge as much as I am comfortable with. ;)

I believe we last left off in St. Louis... oh lord, St. Louis.

STL is a four hour drive from Kansas City and we arrived there around 10ish... right across the street from Vintage Vinyl was a Starbucks... Lord, I have never been so happy to see a Starbucks in my life. :) Hello, Venti Iced Coffee...

The performance and meet and greet was at 1... they were a sight for sore eyes when they finally got there. :) Got a pretty awesome high-five from the BFF upon his arrival and got smiles and "hello"'s from the rest of the boys... the set was short and sweet...

I hadn't slept the night before, I didn't eat that day and the only thing I had had was my Venti Iced Coffee... while standing in line for the meet and greet, I nearly passed out. I managed to distract myself, thankfully, by looking at Zeppelin records and taking pictures of The Shins gold record mounted on the wall... by the time I got up to the boys the moment [of exhaustion] had passed. Thankfully.

Lisa went before Jennifer and I to give the boys their gift, she gave Jackson a little monkey dressed up as a vampire and he laughed, he was about to sign it and she said, "no, that's for you!" He said "Oh, well I could always autograph it to myself," and he chuckled... I chimed in and said, "To Jackson... Love, Jackson," and he laughed.

Lisa gave Jerad a sticker for the van of a guy in a mohawk spanking a monkey. (In the literal sense.) Jerad fucking ADORED it and Jackson said, "Jerad loves to spank his monkey..." I facepalmed. XD

So... then it was our turn... Jerad was first. I was sooo ready to give him his special present. :D

I had made bracelets for Jay and Jerad with special little charms on them. Jerad's was a friendship bracelet, Jackson's had a charm in the shape of Texas.

I gave the bracelet to Jerad and he said, "I have been waiting for this moment for SOOO long!" I giggled my ass off.

Jay's reaction to the bracelet was just as adorable, however, one that I am keeping to myself.

(I have the left piece to the bracelet and Jerad has the right.)

The boys wore the bracelets for the next four shows after that. :)

So I was basically the happiest girl on the planet for a while... :D

Gave Jay some plaid duct tape. Thought he was going to spontaneously combust from happiness. Gave Johnson a slinky. He is now prepared to be awesome.

So we went straight to the venue after that... we didn't get lost this time around. Jennifer and I have a knack for getting lost in STL... so we were prepared to spend hours trying to find the venue... I don't know what it was, but thank our lucky stars, we were the first ones there. :D

Tin Tin Can arrived shortly after we did and I almost fangirl'd out on them. (As I type this I am wearing my Tin Tin Can shirt that I got in Nashville... Fucking love them like a fat diabetic loves cake smothered in ice cream and topped with rainbow sprinkles... They ARE my rainbow sprinkles.)

They were having trouble getting into the venue to set up... I felt bad. Eventually Lisa asked the venue where the boys could load in and then I went over to TTC (who was across the street playing basketball... all four of them... just over there alone... *hyperventilates*) to tell them. I nearly fell down in front of them. Twice.

They thanked me and I gushed at them, telling them how stoked I was to see their set that night. Later they came out and took pics with us.

BEST PICTURE EVER:

FUCKING ADORE.

I wish I could have rainbow sprinkles daily because they are so awesome.

Meanwhile, I actually hate sweets, but I digress... (*Willow*)

I hate to leave y'all hanging there, however I have to meet a friend for dinner... so I will see you again soon. I promise to not let it go as long as I have. Also, I am almost done editing Tulsa photos. Kansas City was just loaded up to my private Facebook acct... will load them up to my pages in a day or so. I am sure that you'll be able to catch them on Jackson Rathbone Online soon however.

Rock on,

Jodie

Gimme Stitches

"My faith ain't been no friend to me, 
And the way I've sinned, it hanging off of me, 
And I'm sorry, you can't take me anywhere,
Pretty soon we're almost there baby one more night,
It's been a long, long drive, 
And I'm way, way tired, 
I don't need no backup plan, 
I said I don't want nobody, 
Nobody don't want me, 
I'm so sad, so lonely, 
But I'm always landing on my feet..." 

I don't know what's wrong with me why I haven't updated my blog yet since I've been back from seeing the boys.

I actually learned something new... that apparently I have a lot of readers on my blog. I refuse to put a hit counter on here though, or a tracker... because then I'll just become obsessed with the numbers. To all who read and never comment: thanks for reading -- I hope that I'm not too boring, I hope that I provide you some sort of entertainment. That's all I've been my whole life; an entertainer. ;)

Des Moines is a short drive from Kansas City. Three hours. The time passed by fairly quickly, however, in my last blog I explained that I wasn't feeling anything. Willow and I figured out why I wasn't -- that's not something I'm at liberty to discuss here on the public medium. Those close to me may ask me why.

We arrived in Des Moines and followed the directions that I got from Google Maps to the "venue"... except the venue wasn't there... Turns out the venue has the wrong zip code posted for their address on their website, and so consequentially, the Monkeys website.

After being lost for 2 hours we finally found the venue. Fuckers.

Talking to The Bens later (and bitching that there are about fifty 4th streets in Des Moines...) they said they got lost as well but it wasn't as bad as Minneapolis. Dude.

We weren't first in line... six people before us... but it was fine that we weren't first - the girls before us had never been to a show, so I kinda took a backseat, plus I got to talk to the boys before the show and I don't think I would have been able to do that if I was first in line. (Except Jerad... didn't get to see BFF before the show.)

When talking to The Bens, Jennifer asked Johnson if they would play "Twenty To One" since they didn't get to in Vegas. He said they were going to but you know, "Vegas was Vegas..." Later on we heard them soundchecking the song and got very excited.

Even though Jennifer and I were 7th & 8th in line we still got front row. (Which surprised me for what a small stage it was...) I was right in front of the keyboards and right by the speaker. (Never been in front of the keyboards before, always in front of the guitar... *shifty eyes* Can't tell you why...)

The opening band was good and eccentric. Everyone else just stood around with their phones in their hand or their arms folded. No smiles. Not enjoying the music or anything. Jennifer and I were at least grooving to the music...

The boys came on and I adored the look that Jerad gave me when he saw me. :) Like he was actually happy and surprised to see me there. He kept looking at me throughout the whole show... my guess is anticipating when I'd request my high five. XD He's such a good BFF.

Jennifer nudged me and said, "get your high five," and I told her it wasn't time yet. After that song I put my hand up and I said, "high five time!" And he smiled huge and smacked my hand the hardest he ever has... it was like he was saving up all that awesome to give to me. ;)

So... if you're a reader of my blog you may have read the post where I put up this photo of Jay:

In my post I said that I had titled the picture, "why do you never wear a tie when I see you" and I said that he should wear a tie in Des Moines because I think he looks so handsome in them...

Well...

Jackson wore a tie.

I really wish you all could have seen the look on my face. O_O I'm pretty sure he saw it and grinned. LOL

My next mission? I noticed that Jackson switched his Spencer bracelet over to his right wrist. Well, my friends and I think that the bracelet should be worn on the left wrist... so hey, Jay... move your bracelet back to your left wrist. ;)

My 10th show was definitely a success. The venue had a curfew so the boys had to cut their set short. Jackson broke his pick after rocking out too hard to "Reaper"... and then he gave it to me. :) I had to look for it though since he tossed it to me instead of putting it in my hand... and it didn't help that the pick was, you know... half the size of a regular pick... and CLEAR.

After the show the boys were so nice to stick around and do a few photos for us... Jennifer's photo is better than mine... I made the boys laugh. :) Meanwhile, she couldn't get my camera to work, so they all had to stand there smiling for a while in mine. :(

My photo with the boys:

Jenn's photo with the boys:

I am glad that I made them laugh... but I must say that I'm very jealous of her photo. She went to Johnson's side and then I couldn't get Jerad in the frame so I said to him, "Jerad. Scoot." And this was the end result. XD

As we were leaving I told the boys that I would see them in St. Louis... Jerad was the last one I told, I held up my hand for a high five and said, "One more for the road..." he smacked my hand and smiled. I said, "I'll see you in St. Louis," he said, "Perfect."

Adore it.

I didn't get to give him his special gift in Des Moines. (It wasn't the right time.) So I'm going to give it to him at the meet and greet on Sunday. (May have another something special for another certain boy...)

I set up my Facebook Photography page per request of Twitter followers. You can join that here.

2 days until the next Monkey show. :)

My desktop. :) I need to make a new wallpaper from the Des Moines show photos... but my little countdown in the right corner underneath the calender? Yep. Epic.

"Only two days until awesome high fives!"




I'm not even going to have time to change the calender again before going to Louisville Monday. So, so stoked for that show. And that's when I get my new phone too! YAY!

Here's a few favorites from the show in Des Moines. Enjoy, bbs.

I posted more than I had planned to... ;) Perhaps I'm feeling generous today. Am loading up photos to my photography site today as well. Don't forget to fan the Facebook page!

Rock on,

Jodie

...Just To Hear About Your Day

"She's got both hands in her pockets, 
And she won't look at you, won't look at you..."

Thank you so much for the support that I received for my last blog, both on here and on Twitter in @'s and DM's. I cannot believe such an amazing group of people took the time to care about me. It goes beyond what my words can express to you. Thank you.

Also thank you and a quick shout out to Lorelei for making me aware that 100 Monkeys had answered THREE of my questions in the new Portrait Magazine article!

Willow called me this morning to inform me that the article had posted and that they answered a question from me... we had a moment gabbing and somehow I missed the fact that they answered THREE of my questions. (I submitted three because I just really wanted ONE of them to get answered! I had no idea they would use all three.)

Here's my questions and the answers they gave:

(Question from Jodie) 

We all know that you do your "Monkey Switcharoo" at each show and you've said that some people play some instruments perhaps not "better", but differently, adding to the song in which they're playing. My question is do you favor any instruments over others and since you swap instruments after nearly every song live, do you ever blank on what you're playing/about to play or does the Monkey Switcharoo keep you on your toes for performances? 

I've definitely reached for one instrument onstage and found it already in someone else's hands. Wait, which song that I play that on? It definitely keeps you on your toes. Some of us are stronger on certain instruments in certain ways, but it's all about the best arrangement for the particular song.

(Question from Jodie) 

Is the 100 city tour going the way that you imagined it? Is it harder/easier, more fun/more draining than you imagined it would be? 

It's very fun, challenging, and rewarding. It's tiring, but there's nothing like rolling into a new city and loading gear into a new venue, for a new crowd you haven't even met yet.

(Question from Jodie) 

Where are you looking forward to going most on the tour? 

Every place we are going. Seriously, every place is different and has it's little quirks, and it's a pleasure to experience all of them.

Pretty neat that they took the time to answer my questions. (I really wish on the last question they said, "Kansas City, duh!" XD Kidding, kidding...)

Moving onto something else for a bit, will come back to talk about something Monkey at the end of this blog...

A while ago (several weeks, possibly a month or even more -- time is a strange thing for me. I can't really keep track of it...) my Mama said that she was getting "new" furniture from some of our family. (They were retiring and selling their things.) So then she asked if I wanted her futon couch and futon chair. Of course I said YES! (With an exclamation point at the end, just like that...)

So then it snowed and stuff, got really cold and gross and we couldn't ever get everything moved... Finally this week I went and helped her get her new furniture and yesterday I moved my new furniture into my place. The chair was no problem but the futon couch was a fucking bitch.

We didn't take it apart because it's an even bigger bitch to put together so Jennifer and I are hauling it up the stairs and I'm yelling at her, "you have to lift! Lift it!" When two people who live downstairs came out and helped us get it up the stairs and around a lame corner into our apartment. Even with four people it was hard, I have no idea how Jennifer and I would have gotten it upstairs with just us.

So then Jennifer leaves (she was almost an hour late to work) and I'm sitting here with all this random furniture in my place, out of order, leaning half on all my shit... so I couldn't stand that, put on some Lady Gaga and moved the entire room around. It wasn't so bad, not that hard... I could lift the massive futon couch around the living room all by myself with no trouble.

I love rearranging my furniture. I cannot come home to the same thing everyday for forever. (As far as furniture goes, I much like coming home to the same, say, people and dog...) The TV, my guitar and amp are now on the opposite side of the room, the futon couch now sits where the TV used to... blah blah blah... I'll take pics of it all here in a bit. :) If you care.

I need to hang my photos. The only thing on the walls are Christmas lights... I need to nest and settle. I guess we're going to be here for a while... *heavy sigh*

So...

Tomorrow I'm going to see the Monkeys. It will be my 10th show. I'm not sure what it is, but something is wrong with me -- usually by now I am massive amounts of excited to see "my boys" but in all honesty, it doesn't even feel like I'm going.

I really can't explain it.

The countdown on my desktop says "Tomorrow is Monkeys!", I am aware that tomorrow I will be in Des Moines for the boys, but for whatever strange reason, my mind isn't comprehending this. I talked in a previous blog about things "hitting me" but this isn't even like - I mean I literally am not GETTING that tomorrow I'm going.

I'm numb.

Being numb is a very scary thing...

Poor Willow has been trying to help me with this all day long, no one understands me like she does... poor thing. She's been trying so hard and I'm still just NOT. GETTING. IT.

So much so that I have not gotten anything ready for tomorrow: I haven't waxed my eyebrows, picked out an outfit, done laundry, written cards, bought duct tape or even my traditional lighter... Nothing. Nothing...

Now I'm scared that this is some giant sign from the universe about something... I don't want to listen.

I should not have been this honest on here knowing who all reads this... but, for whatever reason, I can't bring myself to delete it...

Let's just quit this crazy talk and get some dessert.

Picture of the Day:

I've mentioned it to Willow and Jennifer, but now it's time to tell y'all - tomorrow's concert will be shot entirely in black and white. :)


[I'm still hoping Jay gets the memo and wears a tie tomorrow. Just cuz.]